Episode 7 – Let’s Finish This Fairytale Already…
I’ve just been watching that kid Fletcher on Australia’s Got Talent as I wait for this season finale to end. I’m actually, seriously, bawling my eyes out… not just because this kid is AMAZING, but because I know my television standards are about to drop significantly in the next 5 minutes. Clearly I’m tired.
There’s no time to dwell on this though, as FWAW is starting – and THANK GOODNESS it only took us 7 episodes to get here! Woohoo!
Bring it on…
Sam talks about how over the last 10 years this show has helped some of the ‘loneliest on the land’ (debatable) find true love. She also makes reference to these 6 ELIGIBLE Bush bachies. Ugh. This makes me so cranky. Eligible HOW? Massive mortgages? Or living off their in laws? Or what? It’s a stereotype that infuriates me. C’mon Sam… you should’ve argued that one. You know better. Tut tut.
|Ahhhh we've all come so far!|
Last Morning on The Farm:
Lance: Still thinking. Oh god. This is going to be just as painful as I think it will be…
Adam: Needs more alone time… *yawn*
Matt: Gabby is a hot mess. Promo Model (ahhh… so that’s what a Brand Ambassador really is) Aprilis sad too. Both girls cry on their drive back to… well… wherever. Matt is left contemplating life on the farm with no girls.
Jedd: He’s ‘keeping his emotion down’. Jedd has come such a long way. There is discussion about his ‘first favourite’ Sam (so what does that made photographer Kerry? Second favourite?) GASP – Kerry is unsure of her feelings though. This is obviously some editing code for something… but I am too tired to
give a shit figure
Julz: He has a fave – Mel. Alex is the good sport third wheel who stands idly by as Julz and Mel have a long and painfully sweet goodbye. Alex declares that Julz is batting above his average. Lots of ‘L word’ and kisses.
Girls are Gone:
The boys all have a week to decide who is their happily ever after.
Let’s Finish This Fairytale:
We head straight into the reunion in the Hunter Valley. This is all happening a month later. There’s lots of beer and cheers and… Lachie… who is still on this show too. Apparently. Sam enters and takes…
Julz: Sam starts by asking what Julz was hoping to get out of this experience? And Julz answers by giving the Donald Trump answer to ‘a wife’. We flash to the city break and see that Mel lives by the sea. Well done mate. Holidays at the coast from now until eternity. There’s lots of feel good tv. Kissing and butterflies and love. It’s ‘the start of something amazing.’ Sam asks to bring her out…
Mel emerges resplendent in pink. They kiss and poor Sam realises she is now the third wheel. Lots of love and then Julz can now go brag to the boys that he is a winner.
Jedd: Sam asks about his date with Sam. Jedd says it was ‘amazing’, and then goes on to list all the amazing qualities about Kerry too. He decides to follow his heart, and so he chooses… (flash to city visit)…
KERRY??? WTF??? She is doing some kind of martial arts, and Jedd probably only chose her because he feared for his safety otherwise. They do some high tea date that is just awkward after awkward. My hot tip Jedd, is that if you have feelings for BOTH OF THEM at this stage, it probably isn’t going to work out. There is some awkward touching and then…
Sam asks if Jedd has invited anyone, and all of a sudden things become clearer… down the stairs comes SAM! Oh the sneaky sneaky shenanigans that go on behind the scenes at Channel 10.
Sam asks Sam how she feels about
being chosen second Jedd
meeting up with Kerry in the city, and Sam gives an answer not dissimilar to
the one Louise gave to the press when Love Rat Blake Garvey ditched his first
choice for her after the show on The Batchelor. Sam says she understands why he
did it, and adds something about his cheeky sense of humour (followed by a lip
rub – weird!). They say they enjoy each other’s company, and it looks like
there is some real emotion there. Too early to tell for sure though.
|Jedd with his first favourite...|
Lachie: We are reminded again of his abysmal failure is all things dating in the past, but Lachie assures us that he is now closer to knowing what he needs. (Perhaps a vagina and a heartbeat?). He assures us that he has real chemistry with Belinda, and she is here… looking amazing too. They cozy up on the couch, and there is much ‘sense of humour’ and ‘chemistry’. Belinda says she loves the farm and is planning her next farm visit… unless it sells… right? (I know, I know… they are keeping the house and a tiny bit of land right?)
Jedd declares that Belinda is “bloody cool”. Nice one.
|I'm still unconvinced... fingers crossed for Belinda though!|
We are told that there is a SHOCK CONFESSION after the break that NO ONE SAW COMING… so it’s almost certainly going to be something else….
Lance: Talks about his overwhelming journey… boring boring… he chooses Lisa. She jumps all over him. He declares he is a mad salt man. And then….
LANCE DIDN’T BRING ANYONE HERE!
Actually… Lisa IS there… but not on the couch.
We flash to earlier that day out in the vineyard. Lance confesses (only AFTER Lisa reminds him of her open heart) that he doesn’t have a full connection with her. He has no goosebumps. Lisa looks sad. She will live though…
I’m just not sure what Lance wants? At a guess I’d say he wants a rough around the edges worker who will keep him warm on those cold and lonely rodeo nights. He announces he is still looking for love.
The boys all insist that women will be knocking on his door.
|Who could resist this face?|
Adam: Sam announces that Adam (although the baby of the bunch) has been the most sincere in his search for love. Yep. That cooking test was a true indicator of how life on the farm will really be. We get the pros and cons of Taryn and Hayley… He said life on the farm isn’t the same without his special someone. There is a slight avoidance of the ‘L word’.
We flash to Adam heading to a cool Sydney apartment to choose… HAYLEY!!! She has two dogs and they feel ‘cute’ together. They have never kissed before though, and Hayley declares that she wants to ‘start from the beginning and get to know each other all over again’ (clever girl). They kiss. They look very comfortable together, and I hope it works out for them.
|Maybe Hayley will finally get around to that butchery course now!|
Matt: This entire episode has been geared for this moment. Who did he choose? Gabby or April??? Gabby was ‘amazing’ and April (a tomboy in a beautiful package) ‘gets him’.
We flash to another area by the sea… and see… APRIL. She announces they are going to meet the family. There is skateboarding and a family gathering and Matt is lapping it up. They seem really at ease.
April walks down the stairs and there is loads of hand holding and cuddles. She is extremely comfortable around him and talks about how he ‘doesn’t realise how amazing he is’. Awww. Sweet.
Sam asks how this is going to work? They both admit they have spoken about it and now APRIL IS MOVING TO THE FARM NEXT WEEK! Wow… talk about moving along quickly. I guess when you know you know. I’d also imagine that leaving ‘Brand Ambassadorial-ship’ is easier than walking away from say, teaching. There is lots of love in the air. They throw the word around freely, and admit that they are confident this farmer has found a wife.
|Their children will have amazing teeth!|
THE END… sort of.
So apparently only three couples are still together. Any guesses on who it would be? Does anyone know? Who do you think? I’m going to say that Matt, Julz and Adam are still together with their ladies. Also - Ten bucks says Gabby was the one who spilled her guts to The Courier Mail today about broken hearts and ruined lives.
The McClymont Sister sing a song together and all the loved up couples dance and kiss.
*drops mic and walks off*